Found My Way

[just a random story]

I have tasted failures. No, not just once, that thing repeatedly happened till I barely taste the pain. Feeling ignoranced and worthless. I was on my lowest situation.I do blaming myself, but the 'selfish-side' of myself win and end up blaming the situation more. So I always looking for the faults that maybe not really really there, or am I just trumped up the whole things.I always say to myself "you've done your best! it's not your fault, it's just the universe against you"

But then I realized, it's just only to cure the guiltyness inside me. More over, it didn't solve anything, and even make everything worsen. It's just only me, refused to accept the reality. 

No, I didn't do my very best.

I  didn't sacrifice my everything.

I still sputtered.

I didn't surrender all.

[Lesson learned.]

"surrender" is the keyword.

There came a reliefed feeling when I surrender all. I found peace. I'm feeling worthful.

Just like the fallen leafs blowing in the wind, I go anywhere fate took me. With just a tiny pinch of conviction that everything will go-just-fine.

Maybe everything wont go as what I planned to be (yes, still the hardest part), but it's only a matter of time for me to open my heart and see the rainbow through the rain.

For I know God has made me with a reason, with a mission; and it will never fail.

No regret, now i accept the reality.

Accepting the fact that I evidently wasn't born for the thing that I was "fight for". Thing that I've been dreamed of for my whole life. Thing that i thaught was destined for me. It wasn't easy. It takes time and sincerity, also willingness to throw far-far away your ego.
But, hey, moving on! A new fresh day will start tomorrow and I wont waste my time mourning and repining, for I know great things awaited for me to be revealed!

This is just a phase, called grown-up.

It may causes pain, but guaranteed the fruit will sweet.

Goodluck, for great things awaited for you to be revealed too!